Posts by author: Jim Beach

Mid term grades have arrived.  That was never a fun time at the Beach residence circa 1982.  It meant rushing home, heading to the mailbox and promptly destroying the damning evidence of my schoolwork “progress.”   Luckily, the days of withholding evidence from the parental units are over. 

As the picture to the left implies, the NFL is a seriously mismatched league right now.  There hasn’t been such a concentration of putrid professional teams, in recent memory, as exists in today’s NFL.  Anyone who has been dumped from their Suicide Pool should really just……sign up again next year-we love donations!  So, without further ado, I’ll give you one man’s take on the State of the NFL, halfway to the playoffs.

Teams That Remind You of How You Feel the Morning After Mixing Large Quantities of Cheap Draft Beer, Whiskey Shots, Martinis and Wine

32.  St Louis Rams – Remember the days of the “Greatest Show on Turf”?  Me neither.  Probably something that happened 100 years ago, which, coincidentally, was the last time Dan Dierdoff had a fucking clue about football.  I would rather be subjected to a marathon Jonas Brothers concert than sit through 3 hours of his asskissing, moronic ramblings.  F-

31.  Oakland Raiders – JaMarcus is the worst QB since Akili Smith.  At least the Bengals noticed that quickly and let him go.  The Raiders?  They still play this bad joke.  The owner is the worst in sports.  The head coach punches women.  And, he’s fat, which, as we all know, is more unforgiveable than putting some mouthy bitch in her place.  The fans are even retarded, getting dressed up like its Halloween at the Home for Middle-Aged Guys Who Had Their Lunch Money Stolen in High School.  My Oakland inside source (some obviously trustworthy fella I met at a titty bar who noted his credentials as having ”grown up in the Bay Area”) told me Al Davis was contacted by the Canadien Football League in reference to being an expansion franchise.  Apparently Al said, “No, I’m holding out for another Vince McMahon league to open and fold.  I just know Derrius Heyward-Bey would be a top 200 receiver in that league.”  F-

30.  Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Any football team with an 81 year old owner who also happens to like soccer (aka as cool a sport as watching paint dry), is in trouble.  He goes out and hires a 10 year old to coach, who is really 32 but, was only hired because he came real cheap.  The Child-Coach promptly pouts, fires his only qualified coach before the season and then turns the offense over to an underqualified and ill prepared QB.  Enough about the train wreck of a coach, lets get back to the owner.  He is 32 million under the cap but, is sinking his funds into his soccer team.  About the only good thing he did was fire Tony Dungy, and his ridiculous ears, and hire Jon Gruden, giving Tampa their final championship until there are teams playing on the friggin Moon. What a bleak picture for the present and future.  Would the last Bucs fan please turn out the lights and throw himself off that stupid looking bridge outside of Tampa?  F-

29.  Cleveland Browns – The owner, another soccer fan (are you seeing a trend?) hires a guy fresh off an epic late season collapse.  His best player beats up a fucking midget.  His QB’s are so bad, Ryan Leaf put a call in to see if he could try out.  Of course, his call went unanswered, since they just fired their GM.  The fans are even planning a show of disgust by not sitting in their seats next home game.  And, somehow, someone out there is surprised this team sucks?  Please stand up so you can be certified as an assclown.  F-

28.  Detroit Lions – Well at least the owner isn’t a known soccer fan.  But, he did keep Matt Millen on the payroll about 7 years longer than he should’ve.  Then again, he never should have plucked the artard from the booth anyway.  The city is going to shit, the football team has been there for maybe forever?  At least Stafford has a chance and Megatron, just an awesome nickname by the way, is one of the best.  Wouldn’t it be cool if they used their next ten top 5 picks on WR’s?  Again.  F-

Teams That Remind You of How You Feel the Morning After Mixing Large Quantities of Cheap Draft Beer, Whiskey Shots, Martinis and Wine  BUT at Least Remembering to Drink a Glass of Water and Take a Tylenol Before Passing Out

27.  Washington Redskins – Where to start.  Its almost too easy.  Worst owner in the NFC.  Worst GM in football.  Not that Vinny Cerrato is really a GM.  Or anything more than Snyder’s figurehead and fuckbuddy, for that matter.  Worst coach in football.  Maybe worst ever, outside of Wayne Fontes and Rich Kotite?  Overpriced, underperforming talent on the field.  Could Jason Campbell run a powder puff football offense?  Didn’t think so either.  The only good thing I can say about them is I’m +$250 betting against them this season and plan on upping that on a weekly basis.  F

26.  Kansas City Chiefs – Their coach never even played football.  What the fuck is that all about?  No wonder they slurp cum through a cocktail straw.  F

25.  Seattle Seahawks – At least they gave us those puke neon green uniforms, if only for one week.  A team couldn’t win a circle jerk playing in those duds.  And a quarterback that looks like Bruce probably enjoys having having his salad tossed more than tossing footballs.  Like Bruce.  Throw in a WR with the most mispronounced and misspelled name in the NFL and you have all the makings for a 4 win season.  F

24.  Tennessee Titans – Jeff Fischer put on a Peyton Manning jersey at a fundraiser and said it was good to feel like a winner.  Was the only time their country music listening, cowboy hat wearing, shitbag fans got excited all year.  Remember when LenDale White was fat?  Diet=bad idea since he couldn’t run through a line of nuns nowadays.  F

23.  Buffalo Bills – I saw JP Losman playing in a UFL game over the weekend.  He’s still the Bill’s best QB.  Yesterday, I saw a little kid pick his nose and admire his findings before attacking the dripping gob like it was Megan Fox’s shaved va-jay-jay.  That kid would be a better head coach than Dick Jauron.  F

22.  Carolina Panthers – Jake Delhomme is obviously color blind.  It was probably caused by Steve Smith punching him in the eye.  On a personal note to Jon Fox-give the fucking rock to DeAngelo Williams.  He’s a top 5 fantasy pick-stop giving his short TD’s to Jonny Stewart, you jerkoff.  D-

21.  Jacksonville Jaguars – Jack Del Rio lost his team last year.  Yet, they gave him another shot.  And he has produced.  What?  I have no friggin clue.  I do know one thing.  They suck.  D-

Teams with as Much a Shot at the Playoffs as You Have at Winning a Beer Olympiad Versus a Beach/Wolf Entry

20.  San Fran 49ers – They have the support of the large, local gay community.  Don’t know if thats true.  It may be true of the gay support that PhillyPage2 receives.  Thanks for pushing us at the meetings Tony!  Not gay is Mike Singletary, who is probably still a serious badass.  Can you imagine one of his guys questioning why they should be playing hard when they suck?  I would pay to see Mike casually rip off their face and use it to wipe his ass.  D

19.  Chicago Bears – Always thought Lovie was the worst name ever for a giant black guy.  Name aside, I’m sure he’s wanted to knock that annoying smirk off Jay Cutler’s grill more than a few times.  I know I’d like a shot.  D+

18.  Miami Dolphins – How teams haven’t been able to stop the Wildcat yet is beyond me.  I could see it working if they had at least one actual NFL WR.  Why not stack 9 in the box and single the outside guys?  And, if you stop their ‘Cat, you stop them.  Now, about that teal uniform they hoist upon their unsuspecting, and even slightly heterosexual, fan base?  Fail.  D+

17.  NY Jets – I kinda like Rex Ryan.  Good bloodlines.  He’s fat, aggressive and cocky-traits I admire in men.  But, somebody forgot to tell him that Mexicans should be doing all the shit lazy Americans don’t wanna do and not playing QB in the NFL.  I don’t know if Mark Sanchez is really Mexican but, I do know he isn’t good enough to win football games.  D+

Teams that Remind Me of Kirsten Dunst – Definitely Some Things Like But One Absolute Deal Breaker

16.  Arizona Cardinals – Some team has to win the NFC West and, along with it, the right to be ass raped by a wildcard squad.  C-

15.  San Diego Chargers – Norv Turner still has a job.  I could coach this team better.  And that includes making halftime adjustments on my normal Sunday heavy load.  Lots of talent yet, they scare nobody.  And, its sad to see the great LDT in his death throes as a relevant player.  C-

14.  Green Bay Packers – If their offensive line wasn’t as bad as listening to Tim McCarver, they would probably be 10 spots higher.  But, as we’ve all learned, the game is won up front.  Unless the game happens to be banging your wife, in which case the game is won in the backdoor.  C

13.  Atlanta Falcons – Too inconsistent to be taken seriously or to make a deep run.   Kind of like Romes and his commitment to PhillyPage2!  C+

12.  Houston Texans – See Falcons, Atlanta  C+

11.  NY Giants – The Saints exposed the Giants secondary.  Then Arizona did.  Then the Eagles did.   Then the wind exposed Eli Manning’s candy arm to match his beefy vaginal lips.  C+

10.  Pittsburgh Steelers – They’ll go as far as Troy Palamalu takes them.  Which likely will be to the sidelines with yet another injury.  Is there anything more annoying then a smug Steelers fan?  Maybe its just I hate them so much as they’re the team I’ve lost the most money betting for and against.  Its not even close.  I might be 0-150.  And, as anyone who has plunked down a few hard earned ducats knows, that will inspire some deep hatred.  B-

Finally We Get to the Actual NFL Teams Portion of this List

9.  Baltimore Ravens – I think they already went through their slump and are now ready to get on a roll.  Solid team that can beat you alot of ways.  Ray Rice looks like the RU Rice, sniffing the endzone and making plays.  Joe Flacco looks like the Delaware Flacco.  Since none of us have ever watched a Blue Hens game, I can only guess he was just totally awesome and stuff.   But, look out for the Baltimore entry.  Its not just all Defense anymore, although Ray-Ray looks good again.  And he hasn’t stabbed anyone in a few years now so, thats all good.  B

8.  Philadelphia Eagles – Mike Vick is where he belongs, sitting on his ass.  Best thing Big Fat Andy has done since signing on 54 years ago.  The loss to the Raiders may have been the goofiest result in league history.  The Birds should be able to beat them playing 9 guys.  I think Reid took the blame for that one although nobody knows for sure as he is technically deceased at his press conferences.  Which reminds me of a tough question that popped into my head while pleasuring myself in the shower the other day-how long would Malin Ackerman (http://www.flickr.com/photos/magazinecafe/3091995483/) have to be dead before you opted to bang a fat chick instead of dropping one in her corpse?  My initial thoughts were a week but, I found that slightly repulsive.  So, now I’m thinking 6 days.  B

7.  Dallas Cowboys – Tony Romo is back with Jessica Simpson.  Although she’s really fucking hot, why bother?  I’m sure there are other top shelf pieces of ass he could violate so, why go the retread route?  Just goes to show he may not be capable of good decisions when it matters.  At least the owner is a monumental douche, always ensuring his players will look like good people.  How big does one’s ego have to be to think that, because you know oil, you can be GM of a pro football team.  You know the scene in Fight Club when they’re talking about who they would like to fight?  Jerry Jones makes my top 10.  And, because of my well known disdain of just about every human, living and dead, thats saying something.  B

6.  Cinncinnati Bengals – Can’t believe they’re this high either.  But, if not for an incredibly lucky last second play, they would be 7-1.  Tough to argue with that.  Their uniforms are still horrific and Marvin Lewis still seems to get outcoached every game.  And, isn’t everyone really just worn out from Chad Ocho’s tired act?  I doubt his Grandmom even likes him anymore.  It does warm my heart to know his Dad and Mom never liked him in the first place.  B

5.  Denver Broncos – Josh McDaniels looks like the annoying kid that you hated growing up.  For you Berliners, that was Jeff, obviously.  And the fans yelling in-com-plete after every opponent’s incompletion?  The gayest thing since the Wave and waving hankies.  Can we PLEASE stop that shit at Phillies games, by the way?  Its embarassing to a great sports city.  Despite all that, these guys are actually decent.  Brian Dawkins is a great addition.  He’s still The Man, albeit old and juiced up.  B+

Looking Forward to Championship Sunday and a Most Super of Bowls

4.  New England Patriots – The defense was supposed to be weak.  They’re one of 3 teams with less than 100 points allowed.   Tom Brady was going to take awhile to shake off a year’s worth of rust.  He looks to be fully back from the little knee situation.  And, by way of running up the score their last two games, they seem to have the 2007 swagger back.  There is lots to hate about them.  Belicheck’s hoodie.  Belicheck’s cheating.  Belicheck’s genius label.  Belicheck.  But, look out for these guys.  A-

3.  Minnesota Vikings – Did anyone doubt Favre would torch the Packers at Lambeau?  Sometimes his greatness is overstated.  Like his 47 comeback wins.  Some of them are laughable to put into that category-punch it into a search engine sometime for shits and giggles.  Regardless of his place in history, Tavaris Jackson and Sage Rosenfels don’t even exist on the same planet as Brett.  He seems to be the missing piece to an extremely talented team.  Plus, its the only football player my wife would fellate.  Shitty thing is that includes me.  Anyway, they excel at all facets of the game and will be tough to beat.   A

2.  Indianapolis Colts – When you say things like Peyton Manning may be having his best season, you are really saying something.  Not that I’ve heard anyone say that but, it sounds pretty fucking impressive.  He is money though.  Anyone who doesnt enjoy watching Freeney and Mathis come off the ends and attack the passer obviously never played defensive line.  And, since I know thats true of all 5 of you who will read this, forget I said that.  A+

1.  New Orleans Saints – Ladies and Gentlemen thanks for wading through the 2500 previous words.  For that, I give you your Super Bowl Champions.  The defense is a ball hawking unit that can shut down the run and pass.  The only thing that can stop that offense is a Hurricane.  Nobody really wants that again though.  I saw enough photoshopped pictures of looting the first time around.  Although some of them were really fucking funny.  A+

There will be a million head to head comparisons of the World Series participants.  Just about all will be put together by an unbiased and semi-intelligent media member.  One will be written by a completely biased Phillies fan, who spends an inordinate amount of time “escaping reality.”  Guess which one this is?

Starting Pitching: Phils slight edge.

The aces are both top quality.  Its the Phils depth that give them the small advantage.  They have options.  Quality options, that is.  Yanks are probably 3 deep and, therefore, are counting on Sabathia to pitch games 1, 4 and 7.  Thats 2 straight games with 3 days rest for you clowns who suck at math.  Which is probably most of you since, if you’re reading this, it means you’re not busy at work, which means you dont have an important job, which means you dicked off in school instead of learning math and getting a real job.   On top of that, he’ll be facing a quality lineup, which leads to more of his pitches being the stressful kind.  I just can’t see how he’ll be the same guy on pitch #300 over eight days, especially because he’s fat (and nobody likes fat people).  Ergo, the Yanks “advantage” in throwing him 3 times isn’t really an advantage at all.

Bullpen: Yankees edge

Rivera is probably the most dominate player in postseason history.  You have that, you get the edge.  Doesn’t matter that the Yankee setup guys are suddenly shaky or the Lidge has found his groove.  Rivera neutralizes the Phils penchant for late inning heroics and makes the Yanks have to win only eight innings.

First Base: Phils edge

Probably would’ve been only a slight edge, if both players were performing as expected.  But, Howard is playing a different game then anyone not named Gay-Rod and Texiera is scuffling.

Second base: Phils edge

Again, would’ve been a huge advantage if Utley was playing like Utley.  But, a slightly below average Chase is always better than Cano, regardless of how he is playing.

Shortstop: Yankees slight edge

Both top of the lineup studs, offensively and defensively.  Rollins is only slumping early in games-he still hits when it matters most (see NLCS game 4).  But, Jeter has banged pretty much every top shelf piece of ass in NYC.  And that should be worth something, which gets him the nod.  Of course his baseball skills are overrated so, I’m not sure.

3rd base: Yankees substantial edge

Steroids are awesome.

Left field: Push

Ibanez and Damon are such different players, its hard to compare.  Damon throws like he has a vagina (and looks like he is second generation ape).  But, he has a well rounded offensive game.  Raul has been streaky.  If he’s hot, Phils have the advantage here.

Centerfield: Phils definitive edge

Cabrera is a bottom of the order guy who’s arm and range are not in Victorino’s class.  And his name is Melky which, we all know, rhymes with “sucks cock.”

Right Field: Phils substantial edge

Swisher is a good guy.  Werth is a tool.  But, this isnt high school and Werth is better at every facet of baseball.  Throw in the fact that Swisher is slumping and its not even close.

Catcher: Yanks slight edge

We all know Chooch is money in the postseason and his defensive prowess is well noted.  But, Posada hits alot higher and is more relied on to produce runs.  I recall a few clutch postseason performances from him too.

Designated Hitter: Yanks edge

Matsui has the advantage of being used to the job of hitting without being in defensively.  And he’s a pretty solid hitter.  Especially for an Asian who should be doing math or something less manly.  Phils not even sure who their DH is.  Regardless, whoever Chuck pulls out of his ass, will be hitting 7th and, therefore, will have trouble making the kind of impact Matsui can.

Intangibles: Phils edge

Yankees are about as tradition rich a franchise as there is in sports.  But, what have you done for me lately?  Phillies are defending Champions.  Enough said.  It also bears mentioning that the Yanks lose an important part of their lineup during their 3 games in Philly.  Its an often overlooked reason why, despite the AL being a better league overall, the NL produces more than their fair share of Series winners.  Its much easier for an NL team to adjust to having the DH than it is an AL team adjusting to losing that piece.

Manager: Phils edge

Cholly hasn’t mastered the English language but, he does know the right button to choose, seemingly every time he needs to push one.  Girardi?  He probably knows the right buttons to push too.  When he is massaging Torre’s loins, that is.  I mean the guy takes Posada out his lineup when Burnett pitches.  Genius.

I see the Phils in 5.  Nothing against the Yanks, a real good team.  But, its business as usual.  Parade will be on a beautiful Wednesday in November.  And Bruce can watch from his private hospital room. 

807P – First pitch, on time.  For a change.  In honor of Romes restarting PP2, for the 412th time, I decided to keep a running diary of my evening in front of the TV.  So, here we go.  And, why not an early prediction of a 4-2 Phils “W”!

809P – TBS runs through the Dodgers lineup and the Phils defense.  Torre has made some changes.  Again.  If memory serves, I’m thinking the Rox and Dodgers have now sent out eight different starting lineups.  Meanwhile, Cholly is trotting out the same team as he has for the previous seven postseason games.  Its a testament to how good their lineup actually is.  And, possibly, how the the other teams feel the need to match up against the Phightins.  Always a good thing when the other side is reacting to what you do.

811P – Fast top half.  Cowboy Joe keeping the ball down.  Darling agrees.  Speaking of the announcers, I’m sure I’ll be ripping them shortly.  But, until then, I actually like Buck Martinez.  Chip Carey is not good and Darling could use some cocaine (didn’t he play with Strawberry and Gooden?  Should be easy enough for him to get!).  But, Buck makes timely and insightful observations and doesn’t talk too much.  Perfect 3rd man.

818P – Russell Martin, who I just can’t stand, just got popped in the junk by Victorino’s follow through.  Its nice to know that, while I may be 40, a shot to the noots still makes me laugh.

822P – BANG!!  Howard just playing a different game then everyone right now.   That was just flat out crushed.  And, its good to know the Phils don’t act small market anymore so, I have little doubt we have many more years of watching one of the better power hitter to ever play.

830P – Loney called strike three!!  Don’t know why but, I’ve always loved how umps punch a guy out on a called third strike.  They all do it a bit different with varying levels of panache.  Ted Barrett has a play on the old classic “Punch/Pull the Chain” move.  And it is sweet!  You should know I sometimes practice what my called strike three would look like. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vHIKwtNfd8g&feature=related 

835P – Angels win!  Let’s see a seven game bloodbath.  I especially enjoyed two of my most despised announcers (which is really saying something) singing the praises of Jeff Mathis, the author of the game winning double.  An inning earlier Buck and McCarver (http://www.sportspickle.com/article:203/there-is-no-god-tim-mccarver-has-an-album are you kidding me?!!) were insisting Scioscia pinch run for him.  I’m guessing Mike Scioscia has a better idea about his squad then those two clowns.

843P – First look at Monday Night Football.  I’d actually watch anything but commercials.  Except the Black Taco commercial which makes me hungry and horny.  Although, I am usually both anyways.  And that Fergie commercial (for what I have no clue) is definitely not worn out yet.  Especially in HD.  But, a quality football game is an excellent choice to have on the “Last Channel” button of the remote.

851P – Speaking of commercials, just watched a few seconds of the Sherlock Holmes preview.  Was not expecting Robert Downey to be shirtless and throwing hands.  Or to be playing Sherlock Holmes.  Strange choice.  Although I loved him as Wayne Gale in Natural Born Killers!

859P – George Lopez.  TBS.  Not Funny.  Not even a little.

911P – All the classic jinxs are in full effect.  Blanton’s sub .170 batting average against with 2 outs and RISP.  The Dodgers 21 straight innings without back to back hits.  Just lotsa bad stuff being thrown out.  No wonder they’re scoring.  Just keep the jinx stuff to yourselves, thank you.  Damn.

923P - Just got a text from Jeff about Somali women being whipped for wearing bras.  He thought this was good.  Told him I still get thoroughly excited when I unclip a bra.  Brings you back to the first time and the unbridled excitement that accompanied it.  Kind of never has gotten old for me.  Nostalgia.  Thoughts?

940P - Chooch needs to get on so Cholly can pinch hit for Blanton.  Love him but, seems to have lost his location.

942P – Chooch reaches but, Blanton is hitting?  Down?  Without his best stuff?  WTF?  Its not June for chrissakes.  Cholly has had his finger on the right button so frequently its hard to disagree with him but, woulda loved to have seen Francisco.  Little tap out, hope he pitches lights out.

954P - Yep, saw that coming.  Damn defense.  Wasn’t Blanton’s fault but, damn.

958P – John Gruden just said he wouldn’t kick the ball to Darren Sproles.  Sproles promptly races untouched for 6.

1019P – Great grab by Manny after somehow allowing a stand up triple to left field.  Could’ve used that run.

1039P – Thome on the bench talking about how, when he was with Cleveland, they had such a great crowd they could pump up the team.  Didn’t he used to play here?  Kinda forget now.  Jagoff.

1113P – Broxton coming in for 4 out save.  A good thing about being fat for 40 years is it gives one impunity to call other people fat.  Even if they’re not really fat.  Which isn’t the case with Broxton, of course.  But, what is a person to say to me when I note their flab?  That I’m fat?  No shit.  So, just saying, besides the diabetes and virginity thing, being fat is awesome!

1143P – Jeff’s text “Walk off win……broxton doesn’t have enough left in the tank!”  I respond “i think his fat arm got cold!” 

1145P – Stairs vs Broxton.  Seen this before.  Would like a redux please.  Regardless, that moment produced the best sports quote ever.  After all, who doesn’t like it when guys just pound you in the ass!!

1151P – Rollins can make up for an uneven year and slow playoff start right now.  He’s a stud and this is where a guy like him needs to find a way to get Bruntlett home.  Or at least to 3rd with one out.  I’ll take my chances with the Hawaiian guy, who seems to have a sense of critical moments.

1153P – YEEEEEESSSS!!  Money swing!!  Looked like a meatball.  Chooch must’ve been shot out of a cannon!!  Phils win!!!!  Hell yea.  Snatching a victory from nowhere.  I love this fucking team!!

No rooting in the Press Box. I learned that rule in Journalism 101. Luckily as I sit behind the Press Box at my first ever NLCS baseball game in my home town, Philadelphia, the Phillies make it very easy to keep that rule. This game was never in doubt. As I sit in my new surroundings the score is 8-0 in the 7th inning. Cliff Lee is pitching the gem we knew he would and I am getting a nice and calm taste of how the people that have covered my team for me since I was an infant do their thing. Or at least how they do it at Citizens Bank Park. The guys I read grewing up are here, some national guys, and even some international guys speaking Japanese. (I am very used to local and national celebs, so that doesn’t even phase me at this point, but to think that I am at an event that garners international attention? Well that’s just cool.) A guy from mlb.com just sat next to me and I am literally unphased, yet I am still enough of a baseball geek that I am secretly trying to take Peter Gammons’ photo via my cell. Which is REALLY hilarious because, earlier, I was just a stone’s throw from the field, able to take pics of whatever giant player of the game, (Manny Ramirez, Ryan Howard, etc.) I want. But to me? I get more of a kick out of the Gammons’s than the Ramirez’s.

Since my station covers the Phillies, I have had some very sweet access to the Phillies all year. For a minute there, it looked like we’d be shut out of said access for the playoffs. I suppose when an event does garner that international attention, little stations like ours sometimes do get shut out to make room. As of Friday at close of business, this was the case. Then I got a call. And although I would have LOVED to have gotten this notification in time for Saturday’s work-outs to help get the lay of the land here at the Press Level of CBP– I was called at 6:45 p.m. Sunday for an 8:07 start. So I will learn the NLCS ropes as I go… (PS. That picture to the right is NOT an actual photo I took with my cell, even though, as the picture would indicate, Gammons does indeed rock!)

Mosty what I have done with my Phillies access this year is take phillies photographs for myphl17.com. But for the NLDS I will also be blogging about the experience. I am a member of the NEW MEDIA, and we do it all. We write, we photograph, we blog, we shoot video, we twitter, we Facebook, all in the name of getting people on our sites. Again, since I got the call late, I am still figuring a lot of this stadium out, but I feel right at home. Especially among the writers. Writing was my first passion, it landed me my job, in part, at WPHL, and I don’t do it nearly enough. Those that know me well would think I’d feel just as at home with the photogs… but truth be told, at an event of this magnitude? It’s about more then simply a good eye and technique. At an event this big? The pros bring in the REALLY heavy artillery in terms of photo equipment. (While I buy my lenses at B and H? They are using lenses/optics that looked like they are on loan from NASA! So, it’s kinda like being the “regular guy” at an adult film convention witn John Holmes and Ron Jeremy… but hey! I know how to use it!) Writing on the other hand? We all use the same alphabet and langauge, (minus those guys from the Pacifc rim to my left!) and I’ve been at this a good while and will put my stuff up against anyone’s. So, stay tuned! Check out the pics when they are up, and I will update you all again tomorrow. PS. Phils Win 11-0…..Now where the hell did Gammons go…

Eddie Pola and George Wyle had it right when they penned “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year”. I can see how two of the best events known to modern man could inspire such genius. You know, Christmas is finally over and the NFL playoffs are just underway. A most wonderful time indeed. Here is one man’s view of things to come on January 3rd and 4th.

Wildcard weekend kicks off with the Titans at the Ravens. The Ravens have owned the Titans recently including a playoff victory during their Super Bowl run. However, the streak stops here. The Ravens have the top rusher in Jamal Lewis and the Titans have the top run defense. This means that some guy named Anthony Wright will have to play a big part if Baltimore expects to win. I just don’t see that happening. A well rested and reasonably healthy Steve McNair will be enough to overcome the tough Ravens D, a solid home field advantage and just about everything else one could consider. Call it a tight, low scoring affair featuring a lot of Gary Anderson and Matt Stover and a four point Tennessee win. Prime time Saturday night features the first of the three rematches when Dallas visits Carolina. The Cowboys won the first meeting 24-20 in Week 12. Carolina comes in on a three game winning streak and will make it four in a row. The Panthers have just enough weapons to overcome the #1 defense. Quincy Carter is nothing if not consistent. Consistently bad that is. And that will be the ultimate reason why the Panthers will win by a touchdown while controlling the clock in another low scoring, Saturday contest. The Cowboys are a year away from making real noise. Sunday kicks off with Seattle at Green Bay. The Pack have been rolling on offense for over a month. The Seahawks were poor on the road this year posting two wins. Green Bay has lost exactly one home playoff game in franchise history. Seattle was smoked at Lambeau just this year and were installed as the biggest underdogs of the weekend by Las Vegas. A blowout in the making? No. I see a Brett Favre last minute comeback special to win by one. Seattle looks to have solved their road woes. They very nearly beat St. Louis in the Dome where the Rams steamrolled every other visitor this season. They followed that by winning at San Francisco, extremely tough at the ‘Stick (no corporate names will be mentioned in this piece), at 6-2, in a must win, pressure situation. The total stats show evenly matched squads. Look for the aforementioned one point victory in the highest scoring and most exciting game of the weekend. The last contest of wildcard weekend has Denver traveling to Indianapolis. The easy thing to do would be to say that the three seed, with a 12-4 record, will beat the six seed with a 10-6 mark. Further easing the call is that an outdoor, grass team playing on the carpet in a dome equals a serious disadvantage. Case closed-easy pick. But, we don’t do things the easy way here at phillypage2.com. A few things to ponder before assuming the Colts are possibly good enough to win the whole thing let alone this game. What has Peyton Manning ever won? He may be the NFL MVP but, that’s a regular season award. Has Indy had a large home field advantage? No, they went 5-3. Aren’t the Colts are coming off a win and the Broncos a loss? True. But, the Colts needed a big comeback and the Broncos rested everybody but the cheerleaders. Didn’t they play three weeks ago? No, they played only two weeks ago and Denver laid down a severe smackdown, 31-17 (a score that wasn’t even that close). Do I need to convince you further? Too bad-my work here is done. Until Dungy and Manning show me they can win a big game, I will pick against them every time. The call here is the biggest point differential of the weekend as Denver wins by ten.

As Forrest Gump would say, “That’s all I got to say about that Wildcard Weekend”. My crystal ball is showing me a Patriots Super Bowl win. The last time the Ball showed me that, Adam Vinatieri proved it correct (and also lined my wallet with some serious green). But, more on the rest of the playoffs at a later date. So, clear your schedule, feed the dog, lock out the wife and kids, fill the refrigerator with the adult drink of your liking, call your knowledgeable football fan buddies (can I borrow yours since I have none) to join you and enjoy the beginning of what is shaping up to be a most memorable NFL postseason tournament.

Disclaimer-gambling on NFL games in illegal around these parts and use of this information is for amusement purposes only.

Let me set the scene. It’s preseason. Fade into Coach Hitchcock. He’s talking about how the Flyers will be a tough team to beat on home ice. Other teams will not want to come into Philly because it will be a battle every night. Segue into a collage of jarring hits. Sprinkle in a few shots of Donald Brashear and Todd Fedoruk throwing bombs. Back to Hitchcock. Now he’s telling me that I shouldn’t miss a minute of this exciting and physical Flyers team. The commercial ends and I’m on the floor in hysterics. My mind drifts to Rich Pilon taking cheap shots at John LeClair and Eric Lindros every shift and never having to answer for it. I think back to Darius Kasparitis’s first game at the Boring Center after beginning the end of Big E’s career and how there were 20,000 people who wanted him smashed and the 20 who could did not care to. I conjure up more recent memories of Darcy Tucker and Tyson Nash given free reign to take out knees and come in high and late. Now my mind is in full recall mode and I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen a Flyer go after another team’s player for some retribution. Home ice advantage? Tough and physical? Surely they are not speaking of my beloved Flyers. So, I file away the plea to buy tickets as some sort of cruel joke being played on me by the organization’s ad people. After all, those people probably still think they’re in the Broad Street Bully days. I know that it will be business as usual in 2003-2004 and that the “home ice advantage” is just a marketing ploy.

Well, spank my ass and call me Sally-I am here to tell you that maybe they were onto something. After fourteen home games, through the first two months of the season, the Flyers stand unbeaten at 12-0-2, including 11 straight wins. More importantly is how they’ve been winning those contests. They have outworked all fourteen visitors. This includes teams like the Thrashers and Wild who are known throughout the NHL to play harder than their opponents on a nightly basis. They have been scoring goals consistently and have outscored talented offensive teams like the Canucks and Bruins. They have played physical and tough, just as the preseason ads promised they would. There have been seven fights on home ice and all have been the result of challenging guys who had taken liberties on Flyer ice.

All of the above are promising developments in the early stages of a long season. Could the ads be correct after all? Maybe there really is a home ice advantage in Philadelphia this year? Its too early to know for sure but, stayed tuned…

Parity. The NFL’s wet dream has arrived. With a resounding thud. I have never witnessed mediocrity on such a grandiose scale. I recall in the golden days (you know, ten years ago) sitting there on Sunday night digesting a full belly of quality football. Now I feel fortunate when two decent teams are actually scheduled to play and then put on a good contest. Does anyone really believe the class of pro football in 2003 (Kansas City for those of you riveted to the goings on of Manchester United) could cover as a double digit ‘dog against the Cowboys of the early 90’s? How about the 49ers of the late 80’s? I don’t think so either. The NFL achieved parity at the cost of consistently good games. That said, there is no sport as glorious as NFL football!

So, without further ado, I present you one man’s view of the first half and a preview of what to expect to happen between now and February 1st.

Super Bowl XXXVIII Contenders:

Kansas City (8-0)- Top 3 Offense, Defense and special teams equals your Super Bowl Champion. The only other real contenders are in the AFC and will have to beat the Chiefs in Arrowhead where there is a true home field advantage. Not happening this year. There are only two questions involving this team. #1- Can a fairly week remaining schedule equal an undefeated campaign? #2- Do you think Independence Blue Cross would cover surgery to have Vermeil’s tear ducts filled with concrete? I mean its all right for a man to be in touch with his feminine side-it is not ok to actually become a woman.

Indianapolis (7-1)- The Colts will win it all because their head coach is black and we all know the media will demand…WAIT-scratch that. I don’t want Tony to “Limbaugh” me (unless that means hooking me up with some OxyCotins). They are legitimate contenders because of scary good talent on offense and a defense that can win games when the “O” forgets to show (see the Miami game last Sunday if you don’t believe that). They have capable backups, in case of injury, at every position except QB and WR. And that doesn’t matter since Manning releases the ball to quick to get hurt and Harrison is too slippery to take a big hit. The AFC Championship Game (aka-Super Bowl) should be a joy to watch.

New England (7-2)- Bill Belicheck can game plan to shut down anybody’s offense. Its too bad he has 2nd stringers executing said plan. On offense Tom Brady has been too inconsistent getting the ball to a talented WR corps and the RB rotation lacks a real threat. But, it is injuries and the salary cap that will ultimately deny the Pats their second title in three seasons.

Tennessee (6-2)- The Titans feature the front runner for NFL MVP in Steve McNair. And that’s it. And it may be enough. However, my guess is a middle of the pack defense and a featured back, who has been averaging about 2 yards per carry since a close encounter with Ray Lewis a few years back, will spell another solid season without a title.

Minnesota (6-2)- A couple of studs on offense and a much improved, ball hungry defense make the Vikings the top of the NFC heap. And what a heap of shit it is. Being the best of the NFC is akin to being the world’s best self sex provider-it just doesn’t matter. Just one request from this franchise- how about we put Mike Tice’s ever present pencil behind his ear directly into Randy Moss’s eye so that piece of waste finally has something legit to mope about.

The Rest of the Playoff Teams:

Seattle (6-2)- Paul Allen stripped the “genius” of his GM duties in the offseason. Looks like the move worked as the fatman can devote all his time to coaching. The Seahawks are a solid looking team with no outstanding strengths and no glaring weaknesses. Still, this is the Seahawks and one has trouble envisioning them as an elite NFL team.

Carolina (6-2)- Strong defense and ball control offense had the Panthers looking like strong contenders the first month. They followed that with two lucky wins against the Saints and two losses. So much for anything more than a quick cup of playoff coffee.

St. Louis (5-3)- They have enough talent to be undefeated. Guess we can blame the worst coach the NFL has seen since Rich Kotite. Hell, JoePa can outcoach this egotistical moron. Well, maybe not. We all must pray for safe passage for Marc Bulger so, come playoff time, we are not bombarded with continuous shots of Brenda “my Dad was ½ Rhesus Monkey/½ Canine and my Mom was a Slog” Warner.

Miami (5-3)- Defense wins championships. The Dolphins better hope so with Ricky Williams slowing down and no one else on offense even remotely capable of being a consistent producer. Quick question-who would you take as your starter-Griese or Fiedler? Yea, I was also thinking they shoulda snatched up Andre Ware.

Dallas (6-2)- Bill Parcells is the modern day Vince Lombardi. Quincy Carter is the modern day Pat Ryan. They parlayed an easy first half schedule and a tough defense into a division lead. A Cowboys/Eagles question-how does it feel, as an Eagles fan, that the Cowboys and their fans view your number one rival as just another divisional foe?

Green Bay (4-4)- You gotta love Brett Favre. He’s everything you could ask for in a football player. Here’s hoping he comes back next season after another Wildcard weekend loss this year. Ahman Green is great; the defense is not.

Baltimore (5-3)- Once again I say defense wins championships. The AFC North championship, in this case. A rookie QB tossing to the worst WR corps in the league will not be enough help for this D. Prediction-no 2000 yard season for Jamal Lewis-the Bengals will end his career next time they play.

The Inconsistent World Champs:

Tampa Bay (4-4)- Do the math. Win one. Lose one. Win one. Lose one. It all equals 8-8 and no chance to defend their title. Think Chucky’s message is getting lost in the abyss of complacency? A quick aside-how satisfying that the two biggest loudmouths in the game are quickly becoming the two most overrated players, too.

The Best of the Rest:

Denver (5-3)- Somehow are over .500 with awful quarterbacking. Recent injuries to half of their formidable LB crew and four real tough remaining games will mean Mike Shanahan will have to be at his very best to keep them in the playoff hunt.

San Francisco (4-5)- Another streaky team without the talent to overcome the inconsistencies. And it is hard to win in the NFL when your QB takes it in the seat.

NY Giants (4-4)- Would have them rated lower but these are Jim Fassell’s Giants and that means a late season surge after a slow start. It will not be good enough to earn a dance card this time around.

Philadelphia (5-3)- Perhaps the worst 5-3 team in league history. The QB doesn’t throw it more than 5 yards past scrimmage (and don’t tell me about his first 300 yard game in 2 years-it came against the worst team in the league and they benched their entire starting secondary-the aforementioned Pat Ryan would have dropped 350 on them). The defenders have trouble staying healthy. The coach spends more time supersizing it then watching film. I could continue but I think you’ve faced enough reality for one paragraph.

New Orleans (4-5)- Showing some signs of life. Just in time for their yearly December bedshitting. A simple request-bring back Jim “we sucked” Mora-there was simply no better post loss, postgame interview.

Buffalo (4-4)- Remember two weeks into the season they looked like they could run the table? Then the FatMan and his Band of Merry Backups ended their illusion. Weren’t the Bills more fun when they were the lovable losers of the early 90’s instead of just plain losers?

Cincinnati (3-5)- Chad Johnson reminds me of his cousin Keyshawn. Except he is actually good. Jon Kitna reminds me of Kordell Stewart. Except he is better. And not gay. Let’s once again come together in prayer for Corey Dillon to suffer a Napolean Kaufmannesque injury. The guy epitomizes today’s me first pro athlete.

Candidates to be Retracted and Replaced by the Oklahoma Sooners:

NY Jets (2-6)- Herm Edwards needs another Miracle just to finish near .500. The return of weak armed Chad Pennington will not solve this team’s problems.

Cleveland (3-5)- The Browns can’t decide which bad QB to will start. Maybe Butch Davis should have been the one to get liquored up and stoned and taken a ride to figure it all out. See you in 2020.

Washington (3-5)- Here’s two wonderful thoughts. Steve Superior-2004 Head coach of the University of California Polytechnic at San Luis Obispo. And, Dan Snyder getting run over by a FedEx truck traveling at the speed off sound.

Chicago (3-5)- An organization that thinks Kordell Stewart is the answer is not qualified to be in charge of the Voorhees Vikings.
Pittsburgh (2-6)- The best thing to come out of Pittsburgh this year was a T-Shirt that was on sale during Week One’s game versus Baltimore-“Where was Ray Lewis when Joey Porter was Shot”.
Arizona (3-5)- I can get more people to attend a seminar pertaining to placing foreign objects up one’s anus then the Cards can get at their college stadium. Maybe their college level talent has something to do with it.
Detroit (2-6)- Hey, I got an idea. Let’s hire that moron on TV and we’ll prove he has no idea how to run an NFL franchise.
Houston (3-5)- Tough out at home. Give them a few more years.
Oakland (2-6)- Its been quite a pleasure watching them die. “I see old people”.
Jacksonville (1-7)- The coach brings in an ax and a tree stump. The kicker injures self with the ax while trying to chop at the wood. By the way, can we all put our heads together and try to figure out a way to make these one-legged anomalies obsolete in our beloved game?
San Diego (1-7)- MartyBall fails at yet another stop. Has there ever been two shorter QB’s on an NFL roster? How about a high school roster?
Atlanta (1-7)- The worst team in football. By a lot. Superman couldn’t make this a .500 club. I’m sure Mike Vick could come close though.

Here is a simple fact for you to digest. Donovan McNabb has a QB Rating of 41.4. Now, I can’t begin to tell you how one goes about determining a QB rating. Hell, I’m not so sure the guy who developed the formula could recall how many hallucinogens he ate that fateful day. What I do know is that 41.4 just plain blows. It is the lowest of any NFL starter this season. My question is simply, how come it is that high? After all, have you ever seen a quarterback play so horrifically for eight straight quarters? I’ll answer that for you-NO. That’s because they get benched before they reach that 8th quarter of embarrassing play. I am here to tell that I will sniff out the best explanations for this unmitigated disaster. And then I’ll promptly toss those explanations into the garbage dump that has become McNabb’s career and let you know what the true cause of this spectacular flameout is.

The first wonderful excuse that I heard was the booing that began at halftime during Monday Night Football has affected poor Donny. Give me a break. He is a professional athlete-its part of their code to ignore us lowly fanatics. Unless, of course, we’re paying them $20 to scribble their name onto a newly revered possession. Then they can manage to hide their disdain behind a fake smile for a brief moment and pretend to care you know how to fix what ails their team. But to suggest that early booing has sapped him of his confidence is truly a leap into Cluelessville and a lame assed Mcspiracy Theory.

I also heard this beauty being offered-DMac was too bulked up. His much publicized off-season regimen has added 10 pounds of muscle to his upper body. According to Dave McCrossin, strength and conditioning coach for the Flyers, every pound of muscle added to the upper body throws a person’s center of gravity off by 1/8 of an inch. If this ridiculousness is actually accurate, then our Fallen Hero’s center of gravity is off by a hair over an inch. However, I’d like to point out that he couldn’t hit the ocean if I spotted him water up to his knees. Surely an inch and change could be compensated for by any athlete good enough to play professionally. I offer this excuse as debunked Mcspiracy Theory number two.

There has been talk that his monstrosity of a contract has made him disinterested. Whatever genius threw that one out there obviously never competed at anything more than Band. I think its safe to say that when its third and ten (in this case because of Anti-Run Reid and two passes that were off twice as far as a Peter North money shot) the last thing McNabb is thinking is, “Gee, who cares what happens here, I can’t wait until tomorrow when I pick up my new Hummer with the 12 inch chrome rims and purple velvet interior and park it next to my other 32 tricked out rides, yo”. No, he’s a professional athlete who’s been a fierce competitor his entire life. I’d be willing to bet that there are 165 hours a week where he’s got the bling-bling going cha-ching cha-ching but, that for those three hours a week on the field, he’s there to do whatever it takes to win. This is just another stupid Mcspiracy Theory probably thrown out there by someone jealous of that contract that is looking more like an albatross with every successive passing attempt.

This is perhaps my favorite Mcspiracy Theory. The caretakers of the most successful business in the world (the NFL-pay attention people) have decided they are tired of seeing black QB’s being successful. They felt much better when the most important position in sports was being manned by one of their own. So, they decided to take whatever steps necessary to stop this trend. You know, having legs broken (see Vick, Mike) or, in the case of McNabb, they simply intercept the play and send in the package best suited to defense said play. This actually makes some sense. If you also think that the hot bartender was really flirting with you because she thinks you are the only man alive that could provide her with the perfect sexual experience. What I mean is the defenders could all sit down at the snap and there is still only a minimal chance of Donovan hitting anything not made of dirt and grass.

This brings me the real reason Donovan McNabb has been playing so poorly. Drum roll please. It is because he’s just not a very good passer. He made the NFL on his legs, cannon arm and, to some degree, his intelligence. His touch has always been questionable. Think about how often he’s hit a receiver in stride. Yea, I can count the number on one hand too. The West Coast offense is predicated on those short passes being right on the money so that yards after the catch become a weapon. Even when he’s played well the last few years, the short pass has never been his strength. You might argue that the speed has been lacking in the WR position during his tenure. I say that give any NFL WR a pass that hits them in the bread basket in full stride and there are not many DB’s who will catch them. I say this because I watched Jerry Rice, a guy not blessed with 4.2 speed, become the greatest WR ever by running a precise route and having the ball hit him perfectly in stride. McNabb’s receivers are forced to reach out, up, down or back to catch the football, leaving them little hope of making a big play. What you have with McNabb is a tremendous athlete with a fairly major deficiency as a quarterback. Unfortunately, that weakness is pronounced playing in Andy Reid’s offensive system.

So, there you have it. Just remember, he isn’t as bad as he’s looked and he’s not as good as you believed. Which simply means the Eagles will never win a Super Bowl if they are counting on him to do it for them.

A startling revelation has leaked from the NFL offices; the Eagles must win the Super Bowl. Veteran observers of the league are shocked and the media is skeptical of the validity of the story. I, however, have secretly confirmed this story. I placed video and audio devices in the official’s locker rooms at The Vet and the University of Illinois. These referees had no idea they were being recorded but, when I confronted them with the evidence, they couldn’t deny the league gave them the directive to make sure the Eagles win. And you are wondering what evidence some idiot like me may have? Well, I have the same evidence as idiots like you. I watched the last two games involving the Birds and saw this disturbing trend-if Philly is in trouble the officials do what they can to help them out.

The facts: Monday night versus the Giants. The officials confided that the Giants were not exactly a team they thought the Iggles would need their help with. But, there they were giving the home team a few feet here a few yards there. Especially damning was the gratuitous 4 feet given Antonio Freeman on third and four from the six. For those too intoxicated to recall or those rendered too stupid from looking through green colored glasses, it was the touchdown drive that was aided when Tony was stopped at the ten and the ball was magically placed past the eleven and the first down marker. They should have been punting from their endzone instead of driving for the game sealing score. Exhibit B shows the first down grab by Ron Dixon that was stupidly challenged by Fatman Reid. Guess the ref was thinking of his bosses message when he inexplicably found more than enough reason to overturn the painfully obvious correct call made by a since reprimanded back judge. Once again for the perpetually inebriated or just plain dumb, it was the worst overturn in the history of instant replay.

Moving on to the crew working in dreary Illinois Sunday, we find more examples of this “theory”. Anyone see any fouls on half the hundreds of flags thrown at the Bears? This educated observer found a few to be laughable. At least they would have been laughable had I not had a C-note on da Bears plus the six and the hook. A few of those pass interferences seemed to be personally requested by D-Mac so he didn’t look like he was the same QB from high school in front of the same people who used to watch him back then. How about Urlacher being raped allowing their only foray into the endzone? Seems the second best linebacker in football would have stood at least a chance of stopping that play.

These are not the only instances of the Eagles getting calls this season in general and the last two games in particular. Just the most glaring instances of the NFL’s desire to see the Eagles win.

 I know the suspense is killing you so, I’ll be so kind as to end it for you right away-the Philadelphia Flyers will win the 2003 Lord Stanley Cup. Now, I know the last time we saw this team they were being beaten past the point of humiliation. The images of their fold (not to be confused with the “folding situation” former coach/village idiot Terry Murray once spoke of) will haunt the franchise for many years. More importantly, it will haunt the fans, who had to watch through covered eyes, the most futile and disgusting playoff series performance an NHL team has ever produced. I, for one, would prefer the agony of watching porn all day, while afflicted with impotence, to the searing pain of viewing another Flyers effort like that. However, as will be shown, there are legitimate reasons for this grandiose prediction of Philadelphia’s first parade since most of us were hoping to get to first base with our girlfriend.

Not many of the other 29 teams have the amount of talent the Flyers have assembled. That goes without saying. Even fewer of those teams with comparable talent have a coach with a Cup under his belt. That is a given. All of the supposed contenders, Flyers included, have question marks. The size of the question mark is what is important. The defending champion Red Wings replace perhaps the greatest coach in the history of the game with some guy named Dave Lewis. All their really old guys from last year are back. And another year older. The money pit at MSG had what looks to be another nice offseason spending spree. However, let’s remember that “Slats” purchased their players. And the only time he’s ever appeared to know what he was doing was when he’d send out Gretzky, Kurri and Messier some twenty years ago. Those Edmonton teams could’ve made Hank the Angry Dwarf (may he rest in peace) look like a friggin’ genius. How about the Av’s you say? I ask, when’s Forsberg getting hurt? The Hurricanes? Can you say “fluke”? The Devils? They can’t possibly keep winning with no talent, can they? Get the picture? There are teams with some problems out there larger than Cechmanek’s dismal preseason.

I alluded above to the importance of having a coach with a Ring. Now, I’ll say that the addition of Ken Hitchcock and, at the same time, the subtraction of Bill Barber will be the difference between another first round flameout and June hockey at the FUC. Hitchcock’s championship brings him instant credibility in the locker room. Players have to respect what he’s done and will be much more inclined to buy into his system because of his resume. As fans we have to be excited about what he brings to Philly. After all, he was able to convince an equally talented collection of players in Dallas to believe his defensive system would not stymie their offensive talents. This would seem to be his task with this current roster. From all indications of what the players have been saying, he’s well on his way to completing said task.

Finally, there are a few of the so-called intangibles that will allow the Flyers to hoist the chalice. First, what are the chances of the large group of players, who played some career worst hockey last year, repeating their off years again? I would even venture to guess that some of those guys might even be due for a big bounce back season. Secondly, the players seemed to have hated Barber so much they will do anything to prove he was as dumb as they said he was. Here’s their chance. Another thing is the players have to sense the window is closing on the title that most of them have never won. Let’s face it; the core of this team is on the downside. Of the top ten players on the team, only Simon Gagne and Kim Johnsson are under 30 years old.

Lastly, are we not severely overdue around here to have a local team perform well, catch some breaks and win a f—ing championship?